Saturday, October 21, 2023

Murphy's Fifteen OTHER Laws

 1. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.

2. A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well.

3. He who laughs last, thinks slowest.

4. A day w/out sunshine is like, well, night.

5. Change is inevitable, except from a vending machine.

6. Those who live by the sword get shot by those who don't.

7. Nothing is foolproof to a sufficiently talented fool.

8. The 50-50-90 rule: Anytime you have a 50-50 chance of getting something right, there's a 90% probability you'll get it wrong.

9. It is said that if you line up all the cars in the world end-to-end, someone from California would be stupid enough to try to pass them.

10. If the shoe fits, get another one just like it.

11. The things that come to those who wait, may be the things left by those who got there 1st.

12. Give a man a fish & he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish & he will sit in a boat all day drinking beer.

13. Flashlight: A case for holding dead batteries.

14. God gave you toes as a device for finding furniture in the dark.

15. When you go into court, you are putting yourself in the hands of twelve (12) people who weren't smart enough to get out of jury duty.

Tuesday, October 17, 2023

Lost in a Balloon

 A woman in a hot air balloon realizes she is lost. She lowers her altitude and spots a man fishing from a boat below. She shouts to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am."

The man consults his portable GPS and replies, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above a ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude.” She rolls her eyes and says, "You must be a Republican!" "I am," replies the man. "How did you know?" "Well," answers the balloonist, "everything you tell me is technically correct, but I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you're not much help to me."
The man smiles and responds, "You must be a Democrat." "I am,” replies the balloonist. "How did you know?" "Well," says the man, "You don't know where you are or where you're going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise that you have no idea how to keep, and now you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but, somehow, now it's my fault."

Monday, October 09, 2023

Stories From Israel - May Hayat

 


The accounts coming out from the music festival are horrific. They need to be shared. The world needs to know the evil that innocent people faced this weekend. Here is one account from one of the survivors May Hayat (part 1/2): So I went to work with my girlfriend Liron at the bar in the Nova’s party, the whole night and morning we were together. We had so much fun. There was a beautiful sunrise and we went towards our trailer to drink coffee and rest. Then the nightmare began- rockets started flying over our heads. The music was stopped and we waited for the situation to calm down so we could go home. Suddenly I get a phone call from a friend who says that she and everyone who’s started driving back home from the party is being shot. I ran to the police officers closest to me to ask them to go and reinforce the people in the vehicles, but then we realized that there’s so many terrorists in our area and they are very close to us. There was one big chaos. We went to hide in the police command room and we all sat down on the floor. Some people cried, some shouted, some had anxiety attacks and some were completely silent. I hugged everyone who cried and couldn’t catch their breath, and Liron helped the wounded while we were under attack. The noise of the gunshots began to get closer, the policemen stood in the doorway ready with their weapons and looked at each other with a frightened look and shouted to “storm!”. They turned to us just before leaving the room and told us to “run and pray.” They came out and got shot one after the other. The terrorists fired bursts of gunfire at the room and for a moment there was shocking silence. We left the room running to the battlefield, and while I’m running I turned back and I saw Liron. She stayed there and didn’t come with us. We tried our best and ran as fast as possible until we reached some ambulance and hid behind it. The shots came from every direction. To our right, to our left, behind and in front of us. I saw someone yelling at us, “Come here, it’s safer.” I ran towards him, no one came with me. Me and him continued running together until we saw a vehicle approaching us. It was one of the party members who offered us to get into his car and try to escape with him. We got on his car and as soon as he started driving the terrorist started shooting at us. We made a U-turn and drove to the other way and we were shooted there as well. We returned back to the place we were at the beginning and suddenly the car’s wheel got stuck in the sand while we are still under fire. We ran out of the car until we noticed a hole in the ground. We entered inside, held hands and prayed. It was just the two of us, the guy who was driving the car disappeared. I told him ‘Do you know the stories of the Holocaust in which people pretended to be dead so they wouldn’t be noticed? This is what gonna happen to us. He covered us with sand and we were in silence for about an hour until we started hearing footsteps coming towards us and we prayed for a miracle. They found us. 8 terrorists in front of both of us. I closed my eyes tightly because I was sure they gonna shot us but then they grabbed us and lofted us from the ground. They took our phones and everything we had in our pockets. They announced in their walkie-talkie, ‘We have 2 more abductees.” One of the terrorists started talking to me in Arabic and I told him I can’t understand him. I didn’t shout, I didn’t went crazy, I became apathetic. He put his jacket on me while the rest of them was looking at me like I was a piece of meat because I was wearing a tank top. In one hand he holds my hand, and in the other hand he holds a missile. We started walking and I saw that they were looking on the floor for things like cigarettes and drinks. So I helped them. I didn’t want to resist.

The guy who was with me didn’t stop crying and begging for his life. I tried to explain to him that he needs to stop crying, “It annoys them, stop crying and everything will be fine.” They had knives and hammers. I realized we were in danger. At first he listened to me but very quickly he returned to his initial and fell on his knees and again screamed and begged for his life. And then - he didn’t scream anymore. They murdered him in front of my eyes. I was left alone with them. One of them took a board and every few seconds hit me on the head. The other one was holding a knife and every few seconds approached me threateningly. It was important for them to humiliate me. The terrorist who held my hand shouted at them and “took me under his wing.” We started walking towards one of their cards and luckily their cars didn’t start. The threatening terrorist with the knife, the one who a moment ago murdered the guy who was with me, said to me “If you try to escape I’ll kill you like I killed your friend.” I remained standing and the terrorist who “took me under his wing” told me I can go. I didn’t know what to do and in one moment I just started running. I stole a glance back and saw that no weapon was pointed at me so I continued to run like crazy. I hid under the stage of the party and laid down next to 3 dead people. I smeared myself with the blood that dripped from one of the bodies next to me and pretended to be dead for 3 hours. 3 hours that felt like an eternity. 3 hours where terrorists pass by me and shoot everywhere and burn every possible piece of land, while rockets float above my head. For 3 hours I lie among corpses and wonder what will happen to me. And suddenly I started hearing people talk in Hebrew. I screamed loudly “HELP!”. These were the army soldiers, they came and took me to a trailer with paramedics, along with other survivors. In the background, the shooting continued, and in front of my eyes I saw difficult sights that I will spare you and will not describe here. So it’s true that they murdered my soul and I hope that one day I will be able to heal it. But Liron, remember Liron from the beginning go the story? My girlfriend. They killed her. They killed are my hero and unfortunately no one will ever be able to bring her back.”

I can not shop at Costco anymore :-)))))

 I can not shop at Costco anymore :-)))))

 

Yesterday I was at Costco buying a large bag of Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Necco, the Wonder Dog, which weighs 191 lbs. 

 

I was in the check-out line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.

 

What did she think I had an elephant?So because I'm retired and have little to do,on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, 

 

I was starting the Purina Diet again.I added that I probably shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.

 

I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and that the way that it works is, to load your jacket pockets with Purina Nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.)

 

Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care, because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stopped to Pee on a Fire Hydrant and a car hit me, 

 

 I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. 

 

Costco won't let me shop there anymore.Better watch what you ask retired people.

Sunday, September 24, 2023

@ezralevant about what happened in the Canadian Parliament

 I hope I'm wrong. But I think Trudeau and Zelenskyy just did something terrible. Let me explain it in reverse.


1. In 2020, Canada's leading military affairs reporter wrote an article in a military journal about how Canada brought in 2,000 Nazis after the Second World War.
2. The Nazis were in Hitler's 14th Waffen SS Division Galicia. According to military historian/journalist David Pugliese, they were able to sneak into Canada by changing their name and hiding their past. 
4. That was nearly 80 years ago, so most of those Nazis have since died. But one of them is apparently still alive -- Yaroslav Hunka. And if I'm reading the news correctly, Trudeau invited him as an honoured guest today, to Zelenskyy's visit to Canada's Parliament. 
5. The Canadian Press wire service circulated this photo and caption. (This version is taken from The Toronto Star, but it was in many places). Look at the caption on the bottom.Image
6. It says,

Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy and Prime Minister Justin Trudeau recognize Yaroslav Hunka, who was in attendance and fought with the First Ukrainian Division in the Second World War before later immigrating to Canada, in the House of Commons on Friday. 
7. Can that really be true?

Did Justin Trudeau really invite a Nazi SS soldier from the Second World War to Parliament as an honoured guest?

Please tell me I've got a fact wrong here.

cc. @LevittMichael @AHousefather @mgeist @CIJAinfo @bnaibrithcanada 
@LevittMichael @AHousefather @mgeist @CIJAinfo @bnaibrithcanada 8. Hunka was introduced to Parliament as a 98-year-old soldier “who fought… against the Russians… a hero.” 
9. Three months ago, Trudeau went to Ukraine and met with Andriy Melnyk, a Holocaust denier who was fired by Zelenskyy after he said Israel and Poland were lying about Jewish deaths: x.com/ezralevant/sta…
10. And last year, Chrystia Freeland held up a scarf promoting a far-right Ukrainian Nationalist movement linked to Neo-Nazis commemorating Stefan Bandera, the Nazi criminal. Freeland deleted her social media posts, but not before the photo was saved:
12. Those articles were published in the prestigious Ottawa Citizen. Here's an article in the Globe and Mail about Freeland's grandfather, a Nazi propagandist. She tried to keep that a secret for years, and then claimed it was Russian propaganda:
13. Trudeau and Freeland routinely call peaceful, domestic political critics "Nazis" and "far right" and "racist". They're not of course -- they just disagree.

It's Trudeau and Freeland who really do have a Nazi problem -- and it's coming from inside their house. 
@LevittMichael @CanadianFSWC @CIJAinfo @bnaibrithcanada @AHousefather @mgeist @LindaFrum 15. A masked agent provocateur unfurled a Nazi flag just long enough to be photographed and that’s enough for Canada’s regime media to denounce 100,000 truckers as racist.

Trudeau deliberately invited a Nazi soldier to Parliament and… crickets.

#MediaParty
#JustinJournosImage
16. Google has 738,000 hits for "trucker convoy Nazi", all stories from one fake photograph of an agent provocateur with a swastika flag that no-one else saw.

738,000 hits.

Trudeau invited an actual Nazi SS veteran to Parliament and so far, not one story from the Regime Media.
Image

Saturday, September 09, 2023

What's going on in New Mexico?

From @Shayadjinn1 on Twitter, 

https://twitter.com/Shayadjinn1/status/1563083506044915713


 It has been almost 900-days of Democrat governor Michelle Lujan Grisham's unchecked emergency power in New Mexico. Let us take a look at her time as governor. 1/76 

Before the pandemic, she put out a bizarre ad where she runs through a wall. 2/76

This is also 2020, but we're number 4 for suicides. 5/76

The governor of NM maintained some of the most strict COVID protocols in the nation. And for longer than most other states. NM ranked 48th in COVID response according to this April 2022 study: 6/76

s.wsj.net/public/resourc…
NM closed and fined businesses. Some people defied her orders at first, as they were concerned about towns being bankrupted without Gross Receipts tax income from consumer sales. 8/76

NM families were having a hard time balancing work and ensuring their children went to school virtually. NM established a way to enforce attendance. “Compassionately”. 18/76

The NM governor made sure we all stayed home. She used shame and condescending sneers to motivate New Mexicans. 20/76

She publicly posted photos of New Mexicans “caught” without masks. 21/76

She has previously mocked rural New Mexicans in other ways. 29/76

Of course, making fun of New Mexicans is just something her staff seems to enjoy? 31/76

It seems to be a theme with her staff, though. 32/76

Her political ad was rated, “false” by... everyone. So many times. Yikes. 40/76

Planned Parenthood ran an attack ad against Mark Ronchetti, seemingly supporting MLG. They have a financial reason to want to keep MLG governor of NM. $$$ 41/76

She put out an ad promoting “free college”, but the ad was full of inconsistencies. Again. 46/76

She recently called those who would potentially attend the Ronchetti/DeSantis rally in Carlsbad, NM, “far-right extremists”. 50/76

She “declined to attend” even though plenty of notice was given. Why? Was it really the "schedule" or was there more to it? 52/76

Where was she? It took quite some time for her campaign to admit that she was hobnobbing with rich Democrat donors in Aspen, CO. 53/76

santafenewmexican.com/news/local_new…
Is that where the “voters are”? 54/76

Democrat Governor Michelle Lujan Grisham has tested positive for COVID. She put Democrat interests before New Mexico small business interests and came home from Colorado with COVID. Did she also come home w/out-of-state donations? 55/76

Democrats have been in control of New Mexico for most of its history as a state. There have been ZERO Republican trifectas, which would have allowed for real change in our state. ZERO. Meanwhile, 60 years of Dem trifecta failures. 56/76
We are last in the good metrics, and tops in the bad ones. Last in education, last in unemployment, last, last, last.. but most recently? Last in child welfare. Again. Kids don't have a chance until we improve. 57/76

Crime is AWFUL in New Mexico. This is real. 58/76

abqjournal.com/2524724
Monsoon rains made this much worse by causing those areas destabilized by the fire damage to create mudslides in the “burn scar” areas. 61/76

She touted making liquor licenses easier to get during the pandemic. 67/76

COVID caused a lot of issues with employment, of course. This was handled as many things with this administration... not well. 70/76

NM is a very rural state, we already have issues with getting and keeping health care workers of all types, but particularly in specialties. 71/76

NM is going to make it worse. On purpose. 72/76

MLG says that it matters who you hang around with. Did you SEE the way her employees talk to New Mexicans – how SHE talks to New Mexicans? We see her, “inner circle”. 74/76

Is there an explanation for this thread? 75/76

NM has a decision to make this election. Do we continue with the same pattern we have voted time & time again? We keep electing Dems and expecting diff results. It's time for change, NM. Stop voting for last place. Vote for our children's future. Vote Red in 2022. /end